carlo.comments: carlo.log → Dec 8th 2004, 12:24 GMT
Morn
· 5 years ago
FU!
Edited on Dec 8th 2004, 13:29 by Carlo (G-Blog.net moderator)
BlueGhost
· 5 years ago
Because the majoity of strangers who you percive that smile at you want something, and today they generally want to sell you junk, ask you a questionaire or in some otherway waste your time and make your life hell.
They, no doubt have no choice but to smile as its a company policy. And thus the smile is transformed from an honest positive sign into a warning sign that says 'get the hell away from me i'm here to waste your day'.
Why 'percive' rather than see? You can HEAR cold callers smile...
Edited on Dec 8th 2004, 14:47 by BlueGhost
Zhaneel
· 5 years ago
For women being smiled at by a man, we've been trained that it is often a prelude to comments/groping/etc. that we really don't want. And, conversely, if I "just" smile at a male, they take it as an invitation to more. It is flipping annoying. I'm happy and I want to share that happiness by smiling at people. But if I do, often times I'm punished for it. And if I'm smiled at, I want to believe that the person smiling is just doing so because they are happy and to smile back, but again, I've been punished too much.
Zhaneel
tshuma
· 5 years ago
On the other hand, getting a smile from a stranger who has obviously no intention of following it up with anything (passing shopping carts at a grocer's, say) has certainly brightened up my day on more than one occasion.
I rather like the smiles. It's the follow-up that can get to me.
Carlo Zottmann
· 5 years ago
I think you may have a point or two. Still, it's a sad thing.
Outsider
· 5 years ago
[Quote] Many people seem to have a hard time believing the others mean no harm. [Quote]
Well, I guess it's because people in general are very much afraid. Of another war, age, illness, strangers etc. It's a very irrational thing, this craving for security. But with a lot information from all over the world telling us how unstable everything is, people want more safety. Which is, of course, the wrong way, as you have to accept insecurity as a part of life. But then again, we have to go quite a way to enlightenment. But I do the smile-thing quite often, too, and people still smile back. (Okay, I do have a very selective perception, cutting out the negative impressions pretty much).
[Quote] Getting a smile from a stranger has certainly brightened up my day on more than one occasion. [Quote]
Yep. Same with me.
[Quote] Still, it's a sad thing. [Quote]
Well. Glass half empty or half full.
Huricos
· 5 years ago
It's your goatee mate, smiling people with goatees can't be trusted.
Proven fact.
Carlo Zottmann
· 5 years ago
I don't wear a goatee anymore, sorry. :P
Huricos
· 5 years ago
Well then you're an ex-goatee wearer, and smiling ex-goatee wearers can't be trusted.
Proven fact.
Carlo Zottmann
· 5 years ago
Yeah, but I still have a beard, so doesn't that make me cuddly and trusty?
Huricos
· 5 years ago
I thought men with beards were trying to hide something...
Outsider
· 5 years ago
no no Huricos, they are always eager to show, e.g. probes of the last three meals.
Carlo Zottmann
· 5 years ago
Can't happen anymore. Still sporting a beard, tho.
tshuma
· 5 years ago
Men with beards are cuddly and trusty, like teddy bears. Possibly carnivorous teddy bears.
entipy
· 5 years ago
I think most people probably react that way out of fear, as others here have said, for many reasons.
I used to subscribe to this fear, and I would withhold eye-contact and smiles from strangers because I didn't want them to think badly of me or believe I wanted more than to just be friendly. However, I try my best now to smile at the assholes, anyway! :P
I was told once (I cannot remember by whom, and I don't know how much truth there is in this) that making direct eye contact with a hispanic male meant that I was interested in "more than" just being friendly. I have seen no evidence that this is true, and I make eye contact with them and smile on a regular basis. So, if they think I'm being fresh, I guess that either gives them a good laugh or makes their day. *shrugs* Either way, it hasn't hurt me yet. And if it does one day, at least I will be able to say I didn't live my life being a snobby hateful miserable bitch.
All Comments
Edited on Dec 8th 2004, 13:29 by Carlo (G-Blog.net moderator)
They, no doubt have no choice but to smile as its a company policy. And thus the smile is transformed from an honest positive sign into a warning sign that says 'get the hell away from me i'm here to waste your day'.
Why 'percive' rather than see? You can HEAR cold callers smile...
Edited on Dec 8th 2004, 14:47 by BlueGhost
Zhaneel
I rather like the smiles. It's the follow-up that can get to me.
But with a lot information from all over the world telling us how unstable everything is, people want more safety. Which is, of course, the wrong way, as you have to accept insecurity as a part of life. But then again, we have to go quite a way to enlightenment.
But I do the smile-thing quite often, too, and people still smile back. (Okay, I do have a very selective perception, cutting out the negative impressions pretty much).Yep. Same with me. Well. Glass half empty or half full.
Proven fact.
Proven fact.
I used to subscribe to this fear, and I would withhold eye-contact and smiles from strangers because I didn't want them to think badly of me or believe I wanted more than to just be friendly. However, I try my best now to smile at the assholes, anyway! :P
I was told once (I cannot remember by whom, and I don't know how much truth there is in this) that making direct eye contact with a hispanic male meant that I was interested in "more than" just being friendly. I have seen no evidence that this is true, and I make eye contact with them and smile on a regular basis. So, if they think I'm being fresh, I guess that either gives them a good laugh or makes their day. *shrugs* Either way, it hasn't hurt me yet. And if it does one day, at least I will be able to say I didn't live my life being a snobby hateful miserable bitch.